Hotel Dissidia
by epicpiez
Summary: After the 20th cycle, the whole Dissidia Cast learned to work out their differences and attempt to live in a hotel with each other. This random hotel will probably experience a lot of mayhem with the cast.
1. A New Dawn Awaits

**_Disclaimer: _**_I do not own Final Fantasy or probably anything that appears in this story. It probably belongs to Square-Enix. If I did own it, I would throw money on the streets._

**_Author Note: _**_Fabulous, this is the story that I started to write and I'll probably have to thank some of my friends for wanting to help me on this. They took their time out of doing some homework and playing games just to help me! What nice people they are. I might accidently go OOC (Out of Character) and attempt some random humor so just throwing this out there. Guest writer for chapter 3 please marry me._

**Chapter 1: A New Dawn Awaits**

It has been a few months since _Chaos_ was defeated in the final cycle where he was driven to madness by _Shinryu_, the legendary dragon, and peace is restored to the world as the endless conflict has come to an end. A neutral relationship between both sides is forged and they all found a nice hotel to live in as most of them try to get along. A brand new day has dawned for the two sides as it started out with _Squall _waking up to his _Golbez _alarm clock. Golbez's daily motivational quote played as he was startled awake.

"Overcome your obstacles, grasp your dreams," chimed the alarm clock as Squall reached for his gunblade, annoyed with the sound. He then smashed the alarm clock, thinking it was one of those horrifying _Tonberries_.

_"Damn it…" _Squall thought as he woke up, realizing he killed the alarm clock. He gets up and walks over to opens his drawer, revealing multiple Golbez alarm clocks.

As he attempts to set the alarm up, _Cecil_ barges into the room screaming, "Brother!" As he bends down holding the broken alarm clock. "How could you Squall?" Squall then picks up the pieces of the alarm clock and throws it into the trash can already halfway filled with alarm clock bits.

"Here Cecil, have an alarm clock, it has your brother in it." Squall muttered as he handed the clock to Cecil.

"I will cherish this with my soul." Cecil replied, holding it near his heart. He walks out of the room as Squall puts on his classic black leather jacket, leaving his room to get some breakfast.

"Good morning to you, Squall," greets Warrior as he leaves the room at a similar time as Squall.

"Morning…" he blandly replies, in a hurry to get his breakfast. He rushes out of the hotel room and opens the elevator.

"WAIT, HOLD THE ELEVATOR!" He hears as he glances by and sees _Tidus_ rushing out of his room. In a desperate attempt, Tidus does a handspring and leaps sideways just as Squall repeatedly pushes the close button.

"Whew… Thanks Squall, I knew you were trying to press the open button for me." Tidus thanked. Squall remains silent for the entire elevator trip, keeping his poker face up so that no one knows his emotion. The elevator door opens occasionally as Squall is only on the seventh floor. The elevator reaches the bottom, where breakfast is being served. He walks over to the small cereal boxes and gets a bowl. Squall chooses Frosted Flakes because "_They're GRRRREAT!" _Tidus picks out a box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch. He places his bowl on the counter and begins pouring toasted cereal squares into it. While he furiously shakes the box to coax out the last of the delicious rectangles, his elbow hits the edge of the plastic bowl and sends a hailstorm of cinnamon grahams onto his bare feet. The bowl lands on his big toe. Tidus refrained from screaming, although he was noticeably upset from his clumsiness. Squall dumped a gallon of whole milk into his sugar coated cornflakes, spilling it everywhere and soaking the other cereal boxes. He grumbled quietly, but didn't dare show any frustration. He also made no attempt to clean up his mess Tidus refilled his bowl with Lucky Charms, which had lived up to its name as it was the least soggy from Squall's milk accident. Unfortunately, all the milk had been wasted thanks to Squall. Both of them groggily carried their bowls without slipping on milk or wet cereal. No one was there as it was half past 1 o'clock, and everyone who wasn't lazy had eaten all the decent food.

Squall sat down with a cold expression on his face and let his breakfast gradually get ruined before eating the not-so-crunchy meal. He slowly gulped down the slimy squares. Tidus quickly devoured his marshmallow and toasted oat cereal before they could reach a fate similar to Squall's meal and the poor boxes back at the counter. Tidus was still hungry and rummaged through the remaining food available. As they were finishing their cereal, they saw _Exdeath_ walking to the counter and cleaning up the mess that Squall and Tidus had made.

"So Exdeath… how's the job of being a janitor…" Squall questioned, looking only at his cereal bowl emotionlessly.

"_The Void_ feels offended of having to take everyone's trash away. The Void is a wonderful place. It shall be mine! Mwa-ha-ha!" Exdeath ranted.

"Well, good luck with that Mr. Bad Guy!" Tidus laughed as he ran outside to play _Blitzball_ in the lake. The hotel, as a courtesy to any athletes staying there, had provided a body of water sufficient for Blitzball.

Exdeath finished tossing all the boxes of Apple Jacks and Froot Loops that had been spoiled by the milk and cereal fiasco. Then he left the sparkling clean counter to go fix a broken toilet somewhere in the facilities.

Squall thought to himself, "_I'm in the mood for a cup of coffee._" He trudged to the coffee machine. There were step-by-step instructions, which of course Squall had a complete disregard for considering how tired he was. He had no idea how to use these "newfangled" inventions. He took a water bottle from the fridge and poured it where the ground coffee was supposed to go. Then he took a packet of espresso mix and sprinkled it in with the water. Squall put a dash of sugar in for good measure, then found where he was supposed to put the water. The warrior shrugged and poured hot chocolate mix in, and added a small amount of creamer. He pressed some buttons and put a plastic cup beneath the spout.

The machine obviously didn't respond well to this kind of abuse. The water section heated up to boiling, which of course, meant the cocoa and creamer began to burn. The sections clearly labeled "COFFEE" and "WATER" were mixed together into a steaming hot, clumpy mess. The machine jammed, and attempted to notify Squall of the malfunction. He ignored it, busy sleeping over at the table.

The coffee maker had safety measures implemented to save itself from disaster, which failed since it was unable to eject the gooey mixture. Although the machinery was jammed, it still tried to mix the amalgam of liquids and solids. Pressure began to rise in the container.

BOOM!

Squall woke up with the kitchen coated in gunk and shattered glass.

"_Well, damn it…" _He ran to the elevator trying to not make anymore sound as he heard the hotel manager arriving.

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Alright guys! That was it for this chapter, I'll try to write more if this isn't enough yet. Remember to review for any suggestions! I'll see you guys later next time!


	2. The Fateful Evening

**Chapter 2**

**The Fateful Evening**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy, it's Square-Enix's fabulous property. I do own Sean though since I did not just completely rip him off of my friend in real life. :D**

**Author's Note: Hey guys! I'm back with an update for this story! I was really tired when this happened and of course, two of my friends helped me with this in a Google Docs. Please clap for them! *applaud* I was really tired when I finished this up, so the ending might be not well writen. (As stated from one of my friends. XD)**

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The day carried on and it was dinnertime in the hotel. Emperor Mateus was too lazy to go out to eat so he decided he wanted some bagels. Unfortunately the toaster was broken thanks to a certain exploding coffee machine in the morning. The only viable method of cooking his round bread torus was the oven.

Everyone else had no idea of The Emperor's diabolical plan to use an oven instead of a toaster. Terra was sitting at a table, slowly sipping cold chocolate milk because the coffee machine had mysteriously disappeared. Her index finger traced a name in midair. He wasn't here, but she blushed faintly anyway. She had been in the mood for fancy dinner lately, and she knew exactly who she wanted to enjoy it with.

Back at the various kitchen appliances that hadn't been ruined yet, Mateus put the bagels on a pan with foil around it and stuck it in the oven. He closed the oven door and turned it on. Since ovens had a low temperature compared to toasters, the bagel wasn't turning very crispy.

"Imbecile oven! Why won't you work!" Mateus exclaimed. Being the emperor, he would have his servants do all the cooking for him.

In his room, Vaan decided that he would wear a shirt for once and decided to wear the one he did when he met _Luso_. While walking out of the room, he saw a _Scion_ pendant that Luso let him keep on his desk and his thoughts drifted back to an Esper girl that he saved a while back. Smiling at that thought, he walked out of the room and proceeded to the elevator.

"Well hello there pretty boy!" said a maniacal voice. The creepy clown man, Kefka, was hanging from his feet on the ceiling.

"Do you need me to take some trash out aga-" Vaan started but Kefka covered his mouth.

"Hush little one, we don't need bring THAT back up…" He grumbled. "Well now if you'll excuse me, I have a BIRTHDAY PARTY to perform at! I'll be seeing you later pretty boy!" Kefka exclaimed as he magically disappeared in a flash. Vaan shivered at the thought that someone would hire Kefka for a birthday party. Thinking someone was going to stop him, he shrugged off the thought and continued to the elevator. Upon reaching the bottom, he has already noticed the long line for getting dinner. He shifted his eyes and saw a head of familiar blonde hair.

Terra.

Vaan quickly turned his head away and got himself an apple. He paid no attention to Mateus screaming obscenities at the oven.

Terra spotted Vaan walking to the nearest empty table to her. _This is my chance. Probably the only one I will have in a while, or ever._ Her heartbeat's pace rose and her hands started getting sweaty. As Vaan took the first bite into his bright red apple, Terra stood up, pushed her chair back, and slowly and shakily walked over to his table.

Mateus continued being completely inept with cooking. "AAARRRGGGHHH! YOU FOUL CONTRAPTION SHALL FACE MY WRATH!" The Emperor pulled his staff out of the supply closet, tripping over some brooms and mops. The cleaning instruments toppled over and clattered onto the ground.

"HEAVEN AND HELL! YOU SHALL ANATE THIS ACCURSED BEING OF MACHINE!" The Emperor continued the constipated grunting sound for ten more seconds and then finally…

"Hey Vaan…" Terra nervously said. Her mouth was dry and her body was quivering. Vaan looked up at her, his apple long finished because Terra had taken quite a while to get to his table.

"...Yes?" He seemed anxious as well.

"Well…I just wanted to know if...you …"

"HAH!" After that long constipated grunt for a while now, the star from Heaven and Hell shot from outer space and into the kitchen, igniting everything into flames. The sprinklers went off, ruining the already destroyed bagels into a sloppy mess of ashes. Everyone completely disregarded proper emergency protocol and ran out of the hotel.

Terra looked around, panicking. Vaan grabbed her arm and they ran out of the building as firefighters poured in and extinguished the blaze. A couple minutes later, they found out the star was so small, it only exploded the oven. The firefighter brought out the remains of what was left from the _machina_, a single piece of edible bagel. Mateus walked out of the hotel unscathed but very upset that the bagel turned out a bit _too _crispy.

"I DEMAND MY BAGEL!" Mateus exclaimed, holding his hand out, clearly wanting the bagel.

"Oh, this is a bagel? I don't really need it so here you go." the fireman said. Mateus, finally pleased to be able to have his food, snatched it out of the fireman's hand. As he took a bite into it, he realized it tasted to plain and decided it was no longer worth eating.

He pointed to a nearby pedestrian asking, "You there! Yes, you! Tell me, how can I make this bland bagel taste better!" The person looked at the bagel, then handed out a coupon to a store that had a 50% off price for something called "_I can't believe it's not butter!" _

"And tell me how am I suppose to get to this place you call a _market_?" The Emperor questioned. The man quickly pointed the man down the streets to a local _'Wal-Mart'_. Mateus snapped his fingers and ordered a ride from his loyal servants in parking lot as they rode out on their steeds and to the supermarket.

At the market, Mateus ordered the Black Knights to escort him inside. They took him to the dairy aisle and saw the last tube of _"I can't believe it's not butter!"_ As he opened the freezer to claim it as him own, a short boy with glasses and a green jacket was reaching for that tube also. The two exchanged a glare with each other.

"You dummy, I got here first!" The boy exclaimed, unaware of the authority figure of The Emperor. Mateus did notice that there were pieces of silver in his mouth.

"Are you some meddling child from a royal family? Your mouth is filled with silver in it." He questioned. The boy looked at him like if he was Shrek running through the market.

"No you f*ggot, these are called _braces_. They help your teeth stay straight. Are you new here or something!" The boy retorted. As The Emperor was thinking of a retort, the boy grabbed the tube of _"I can't believe it's not butter!" _and ran off. He didn't notice until the Black Knight informed him.

"Sir… The boy ran off… But we did get a slip of paper since he didn't close his bag." He said as he handed The Emperor the paper.

"His name is _Period Three_? What an odd name…" Mateus thought out loud. The Knight then pointed above.

"Ahh, thank you, you seem to want a promotion Knight, very well, you keep up this good work and you can get one. If, of course, you continue serving the greatest ruler there was… Ahh yes his name… *mumble, grumble* Sean Hale! I will get you one day! Mark my words, you will pay!" The Emperor yelled in the store as people looked at him and his bagel got cold.

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**Alright guys! That's all for this chapter! Hope you guys enjoyed it and remember to leave a review on what I can work on. Alright see ya guys!**


	3. The Date

**Chapter 3: The Date**

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy, Square Enix owns it. I mean, if I owned FF I wouldn't have any business writing a fanfiction about it.**_

_**Author's Note: Hey everyone! I'm the guest writer for this chapter. I'm not the best at staying in character, and I think my grammar could use a little improvement. Please rate and review, and tell me which areas I should work on. Thanks!**_

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The hotel magically had barely any damage aside from the oven which had been ruined by Emperor Mateus's bagel rampage. After inspectors took a quick glance and made sure there was no smoke left, they let the residents back in. Mateus returned from the store weary and tired. He went straight to his room and fell asleep. That night he had vivid nightmares of empty tubes of "I can't Believe it's not Butter!"

Outside, it was already dark. The hotel had been evacuated for quite a while now, and the many people staying there were dying to get back in. The sky was navy blue by now, and a few stars were starting to appear. The moon was waning, and was approaching its crescent phase. The air was slightly warm, but a cool breeze ran through it. As everyone filed into the building, Terra found Vaan and pushed through the crowd to him. Her heart rate rose again, her hands sweaty, her stomach fluttering.

He heard the cries of "Hey! Watch where you're going!" and "Ow!", so he turned around.

Illuminated by the dim moonlight, Terra was standing right in front of him. In the mayhem of the fire, her hair had come untied. The blonde waves partially covered the half-Esper's face. She smiled shyly, took a breath, and asked,

"Hey Vaan...I just wanted to know if you wanted to go out to dinner with me?" She said with short pauses in between some of the words.

"Of...of course, Terra!" He stammered a bit, losing his cool temporarily. His face turned red and he blinked excessively. After a few seconds his color went back to normal and he just smiled. "Yeah sure, Terra, I'll have dinner with you." Terra gave him the widest smile he had ever seen, and jumped up to hug him.

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The half-Esper girl stood in her hotel room. Next to her laid a bag filled with clothes that she had just bought (Terra needed to update her wardrobe, and going shopping for a new dress was just the right excuse). She dug through the clothing she had grabbed for only a handful of Gil and found the garment that had cost her quite a bit at 20000 Gil. It had been folded up carefully, to discourage wrinkling of the fine fabric. It wasn't ridiculous in its embellishments, yet it was fancy enough for a date at a fine restaurant. Terra shook her head as she remembered all those dresses covered in unnecessary belts and zippers. This outfit only had one of each. The mint green and tan gown was modest and elegant. She looked in her mirror and smiled as she smoothed out the few lines in the silky, soft dress. It was time to leave now, since they had decided on dinner at 8 the day after the fire.

Vaan woke up from his nap. It was 7:45. He didn't want to be late(that would make a bad impression on his girl), so he pulled on whatever he could find that was remotely acceptable within the dress code of the Gourmet Kupo and rushed out the door.

The restaurant was only a block away from the hotel, so it was fairly easy to find. Terra looked a little silly wearing an evening gown out on the streets, but pretty much everyone she knew wore outlandish outfits compared to the townsfolk who lived here. She walked into the restaurant. The atmosphere was classy, yet warm. The dim lights were just enough to show off the elegant interior of the restaurant. A moogle greeted Terra after she finished giving the building a once-over.

"Hello ma'am, welcome to the Gourmet Kupo. Would you like a seat, kupo?"

"No thanks, I'm waiting for someone."

"Ok."

Vaan ran outside into the cool air. He knew where the restaurant was since he had seen it on the way to the hotel. He still got lost. Twice. When he strolled through the doors of his destination, the clock had just reached 8.

"Hey Terra! I'm here!"

"Uh…"

Vaan smiled at his date, wearing clothes entirely inappropriate for the occasion and the temperature inside.

"...Vaan? Where is...your shirt?" Terra said quietly and blinked a couple times. She was used to him wearing nothing on top but a skimpy…vest-thing, but here she had expected him to dress for a nice place.

"Uh...well, I was running late, and I certainly wouldn't wanna be late for a night out with you!"

"Um...I wouldn't mind, as long as you were actually wearing some proper garments," she barely whispered."Well, at least you have that jacket, right?" Vaan immediately fastened it to cover up his chest. Now he was a little less embarrassing to be with. The slightly distraught moogle led the pair to a nice table (they would have preferred a booth, but Terra didn't want to seem too demanding) next to the window. The laminated menus were handed out.

"Wow, this sure is expensive," Terra quietly remarked to Vaan. The employees wouldn't have heard it, but still.

"Don't worry, I have plenty of Gil!" The pirate dropped a sack of coins onto the table. The loud clang alerted a few customers. Vaan scooted his chair back, and attempted to put his feet up on the table. Terra stopped him before he could do that. A moogle then walked over, set up a stool, and stood upon it.

"Hello you two, I'm going to be your server. What would you like to drink, kupo?"

"Hmm, I think I'll have a cup of chamomile tea," said Terra after pondering for a little bit.

"And I'll have the Phoenix Down Milkshake!"

"Sounds great! I'll be back in a little while with your drinks and to take your order, kupo."

* * *

Yuna stood in the middle of a field, a few miles from the hotel. She hadn't summoned anything in quite a long time, since everyone had more or less retired their powers after Chaos's defeat. But of course, danger could strike at any time, so they had all decided to practice their skills in private. It really was a "use it or lose it" kind of thing, especially magic. So, it was time to pick up summoning again. Yuna had always wanted to try summoning creatures other than her aeons ever since the war. Maybe an Esper this time. She raised up her staff and looked skyward.

* * *

"Vaan, how many times do I have to ask you to please stop putting your feet on the table?" Terra said firmly yet politely. The moogle server was already returning with their drinks, and to take their order.

"I'll have this fish, it looks quite delicious, and Vaan, what would you like to have?" Terra finished as the moogle quickly jotted down what Terra ordered and turned her head to face Vaan.

Taking a close look at the menu, it took him a very long time to find something he had recognized until he stumbled upon something he remembered, "I'll have the Galbana Lily salad."

"Ok! Thank you, kupo. I will be back soon with your meal." Then the server tucked her pencil away and left. The restaurant was getting filled up at the moment due to it getting later, many more couples were deciding to have a fancy dinner also.

"Could it be a special occasion?" Terra thought. It would obviously be a while before the food would arrive. Vaan quickly got impatient after five minutes and threw his Zodiac Blade onto the ground. CLANG!

"Vaan-!"Terra snapped at her date. This is a really nice place! But first he comes in without a shirt, shows poor table manners, and now he's gonna get unruly. I guess he can't help it, thanks to his upbringing… and there Vaan was, reclining in his chair, his feet on the table. The blonde-haired girl nudged them off. "I know you can behave better than this, Vaan." she remarked softly.

Half an hour passed. In that space of time, Terra repeatedly corrected Vaan's etiquette, and the two were shot dirty looks every once in a while by some of the more proper customers in the vicinity. Finally, the moogle came over to their table, carrying two dishes. The couple was starving since they hadn't eaten for several hours. As soon as the platters were placed on the table, they dug in. Vaan began devouring his salad, while Terra was a bit more conservative with her bites. She let the fish cool off a bit to a bearable temperature before cutting it into pieces and slowly eating. Vaan finished well before her, of course, and then proceeded to let out an audible burp. Terra blushed a bit. They both drank their beverages to wash down the dinner.

It would be a bit before the waitress came back for the payment. They ate the complimentary mints (no room for dessert) and took a swig of water. There was a great deal of chatter going around the two, but to Terra and Vaan, it was quiet and peaceful where they were. The half-Esper looked down and giggled a bit. Vaan let out a chuckle and laid back. To them, the only people there were each other. They both reached in towards each other….

* * *

Yuna thrust her staff into the ground. A swirling flash of light appeared in the sky and descended onto the ground. A very frazzled Terra landed onto the soft grass. Once she realized what was going on, she cast a glare at Yuna. The summoner laughed sheepishly.

* * *

"Huh? Terra?" Vaan's date had vanished into thin air.

The moogle waitress came over to the table.

"Alright, your total is 6000 Gil...where'd that girl go, kupo?"

"She just disappeared on me. Oh well, here's your money…" Then Vaan sulked away and went home. He didn't even bother to bring the leftovers.

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**_Alright everyone, that's the end of this chapter! Thanks for reading!_**


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